Trying to find a person willing to carry a baby for you is like trying to find a needle in a hay stack, seemingly impossible. The more I look, the more I get frustrated and feel like giving up. We will be using donor eggs whenever we find that person so really, I just need an incubator.
One would think that wouldn't be too hard to find, one woman who has already had her children, loves being pregnant, all of her parts are in tact and she is compassionate enough to be willing to do this for us. So far, I have struck out on everyone I have asked or thought about asking.
Since I am one who has to laugh or I will cry, I will share some of those awkward moments here so you can laugh too!
1) I asked my sister in law if she wanted to "be like Phoebe on "Friends" and carry her brother's baby". (To be fair, I didn't really expect her to say yes as she doesn't yet have kids of her own and I don't expect anyone who doesn't have kids of their own yet to be willing to be a surrogate.)
2) I heard from a friend that I hadn't seen in a couple of months that she was pregnant and didn't even know it for the first three and a half months. After she told me this I said "Great, your pregnancies are obviously easy, when your done with this one, would you mind carrying mine too?" (Oh man...)
3) I spoke to another friend who just had her third baby and said something like "since your obviously able to have babies just fine, would you mind being my incubator?" (Fail)
4) I saw a pregnant woman and a man walk out of the bank and they got into separate cars and I thought, that I should have asked if she was a surrogate for him and his wife....... so glad I refrained! She was probably just his sister or his realtor!
5) I spoke to an old friend who was always against having kids of her own and asked her if she would have one for me. Her response was not only no but...... well you can guess. She wasn't going to ruin her body to have kids of her own, why would she do that for me? (Good point)
I have signed up for every surrogate website out there looking for a match and so far no luck. I will keep trying but all of this makes me want to see if maybe, just maybe, if we used donor eggs and my own uterus that the doctors keep saying is "perfect", that it would work.
The cost isn't that much more than doing IVF and by using donor eggs, we would definitely have embryos left if god for bid it didn't work the first time. If it didn't work, we would know for sure that I have implantation issues and just can't carry and we would then have to come up with more money to put the remaining embryos into a surrogate (assuming we found one by then). If it did work, we would know for sure that I just have bad eggs, (but I wouldn't care because I would have a baby in the end).
