IVF attempt number 2

I got into graduate school this year which meant that I had to move, alone for the summer months for school while the husband stayed home and worked. We decided though to go ahead with the IVF procedure and we would meet at the doctors office for visits. School was 4 hours away from home and the doctor was in between home and school so it worked out. What this meant though, was that I had to do all the injections myself. I did have a lovely roommate and another best friend living with me but she did not feel comfortable helping me in this adventure. So, I braved it and looked in the mirror and attempted the first shot, I missed! I freaked out, (only for a minute though) and took a deep breath and tried again. I got it that time! I ended up being pretty good at giving myself these shots too.

On egg retrieval day, the experience was way different then at the first clinic, they put me completely under. Hubby stayed in the waiting room until he was called in to monitor me. They told him to make me keep my oxygen on and according to him, I was not willing to do this! I don't remember anything from that day. I do remember that we had 8 eggs retrieved.

Now 8 is double the amount from before, so I felt a bit better about this. The next day though, we were down to 6 embryos. By day three, we had 4. At that point, my uterus decided not to cooperate and the doctor decided to freeze the embryos for later use. They called me on day 6, the day that the were to be frozen and told me there were two that they were freezing and two that didn't make it.

Well that is just freaking great! I felt just as devastated as the first time. Nothing left over, no more chance after this. One shot, that's it!

A month later, when we were ready, the defrosted those embryos and I went in to have them put in....... so I thought. Only one survived. I still had one though but again, couldn't help but feeling like I had already lost.

So, with disappointment masked with determination and sight optimism, we waited our "two week wait". This time, I did not take any tests. I just waited. I had a great early implantation sign just before the blood test and was so happy! I just knew it worked! I was definitely pregnant this time!

The blood test though proved that to be wrong. I was not pregnant, or at least I didn't stay pregnant.